Magic Rest; Bobcats Put In Work

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RIP Guru

If you needed any extra juice to get pumped for tonight’s Game 2, just check this quote from Larry Brown from Tuesday’s practice regarding the Magic’s activities on Monday (via Rick Bonnell):

“Yesterday, Orlando took the day off.  That’s how [expletive deleted] seriously they’re taking us.”

Transparent motivational ploy?  Sure.  Effective?  Hell yeah.

Did I just figure out a cheap way to tie in a Guru tribute to a Bobcats blog?  Sure.  Was it worth it?  Hell yeah.

Be sure to check us at Whiskey Warehouse in Plaza Midwood for a Bobcats Baseline Game 2 Watch Party:

watch-party-Dr. E

Bobcats and Pizza Hut target 29 year-old College Students in New Commercial

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I’m a broke College Student…I doesn’t mean I have to eat like one.

This commercial runs 15 times or more during the Bobcats broadcasts on Fox SportsSouth. There has to be some sort of alliance between the Cats and the Hut for this strategic advertising redundancy.

I would like to share some thoughts regarding this ad…

1. The main actor looks older than me and I have a kid.

2. I thought they served Domino’s in the arena; not Pizza Hut.

3. I really like the shot (above) where the guys are so excited that they’re about to pee.

4. Does the main bro kinda look like Rufus or is that just me?

rufus-pizza-hut

At my college, Appalachian State, there was this crazy Domino’s deal called “The Student Special” that was $12 (including tip)  for an XL 1 topping and an order of breadsticks. I was a broke college student. I ate like one.

Does the prevalence of this ad mean that Charlotte is a “college town”?

Does this college student look more like a 29 year old or 32 year old?

Are Wing Street wings delicious or garbage?

Michael Jordan to Appear on CBS’s “Undercover Boss”

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I'm a Boss!

In an effort to improve his “company” and get to know his new “employees”, Charlotte Bobcats Owner-Elect, Michael Jordan will infiltrate his workforce during an upcoming episode of Undercover Boss.

The new CBS reality series follows high level corporate executives as they slip anonymously into the “lowest level” jobs within their companies. Once undercover, they get their hands dirty among their rank to find out what their employees REALLY think of them and learn about themselves in the process.

Michael Jordan will be going undercover as a Bobcats player.

So how will the best player in history remain anonymous on the court?

  1. He will come off the bench. No one will recognize the guy if he’s not in the starting line-up.
  2. Jordan will don jersey number “00”  with the name on the back simply reading “STAFF”.
  3. His Airness will also wear a Rip Hamilton face mask (subliminally cross-promoting Rip’s Jordan Brand sneakers).
  4. Jordan will also wear a pair of goofy glasses.

The obvious ulterior motive of Jordan’s appearance on the show is get his team into the playoffs. By going undercover, he is sure to improve workforce morale by scaring Gerald Wallace, Gerald Henderson, and Stephen Jackson into thinking that their jobs are in jeopardy.

Be sure to follow us on Facebook and Twitter for updates.

Gerald Wallace Slam Dunk Contest Ideas

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Brainstorming Ways That Gerald Can Walk Away With The Slam Dunk Trophy

It’s just been reported that Spud Webb will participate as a judge in the 2010 Slam Dunk Contest on Saturday, Feb 13th. Webb is known to be quite friendly with reigning champ, and contestant Nate Robinson.  In order to unseat Nate, Gerald Wallace is going to have to pull out some pretty remarkable dunks.


UPDATE: It looks like Flip Murray is going to Dallas to help Gerald with the Dunk Contest. It’s going to be interesting to see what they pull off.


Here are a few of our initial ideas on what Crash might do when given the opportunity to showcase what he’s got. Of course, every great dunk gets a sweet name. Let us know if you have any other dunk ideas in mind.

Big Tex

DUNK #1. “The Dallas State Fair”

It’s pretty simple – Gerald will bring out “Big Tex” from the State Fair of Texas, and dunk over him, clearing his cowboy hat.

DUNK #2. “First In Flight”

In this one, Gerald would pull out his mouth-piece and put a healthy serving of NC BBQ inside. Then as he runs from half-court , he would shake a full bottle of Texas Pete sauce all over the BBQ and put the mouthpiece in as he leaps from the foul-line. After slamming the ball through the rim, the judges would realize that a miniature model ship had been placed inside the Texas Pete bottle.

DUNK #3. “Pistolas”

For this dunk, Crash will hold a Texas beer can in each hand ( Shiner & Lone Star).  Stephen Jackson will lob the ball toward the goal, while Gerald pounds the beers and twirls the bottles into holsters on each hip as he leaps for a reverse jam. As he lands back onto the court, he’ll have already pulled the beers back out of the holsters in time to stop Stephen Jackson from punching a fan in the second row.

DUNK #4. “T. Boone Pickens Windmill Jam”

Gerald nearly gave this away during a game against the Kings earlier this season, but this dunk will be a windmill jam that creates such a furious gust that it will power the entire arena – yes the turbo-huge Texas Stadium.

DUNK #5.  “Texas Two-Step”

This is one that I’m certain we’ll see. To start, Gerald will lead a group of line-dancers in a fast-paced routine, but eventually the line stands side-by-side from the baseline to the top of the key. With spurs on his heels, Crash will then leap over all of the line dancers for the slam. The NBA will finally allow spurs after seeing this display.

.500

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Bobcats Baseline is pleased to provide our readers this collectors edition jpeg to commemorate the Bobcats’ milestone .500 winning percentage.

500

Let’s rejoice in our team’s evenness.

Bobcats for Black Friday

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Today is Black Friday and I’m shopping for all things Bobcats! Fellow Baseliners, may I present you with…

The Top 10 Charlotte Bobcats Products on the Internet

Controller

#10 • Bobcats XBOX Controller

I’m looking forward to playing with Okafor on NBA 2K6 on my original xbox. The 360 is so overrated.


Sign

#9 • Bobcats Neon Sign

A sign maker in Austin TX saw an niche in NBA teams that needed neon signs. • Bargain Priced at $424 »


Auto Mats

#8 • Bobcats Floorboard Mats

Imagine the routine of cleaning your car before every game for good luck. Or you can just let them get filthy and faded if the season goes down the shitter. • Increase your car’s resale value for $38 »


TOoy Chest

#7 • Bobcats Toy Chest

Keep all your kid’s crap stowed away and show your team support with this very large toy chest. I upfitted my son’s room with matching lamp and rocking chair. • Get toy chest for $150 »


Garage Storage

#6 • Bobcats Utility Closet

While we’re talking storage, how about a corner closet for your garage? The Home Depot is offering financing so you could get this bad boy for only $33 a month. • Or pay one time fee of $940 »


Watch

#5 • Bobcats Heart Watch

This is a great way to show your old lady who is #2 on your list of priorities. This is definitely going to be my wife’s “big gift” this Christmas. I may even get her this pendant to match. Buy the Watch »


Recliner

#4 • Bobcats Recliner

Just imagine kicking back in this leather recliner and tuning in to Fox Sports South. Your comfort will make up for all those non-HD broadcasts. $828 well spent »


Watch

#3 • Bobcats Woven Plaid Pants

One word: CHICKS. That’s what you’ll be getting by rockin’ these out to Dixie’s Tavern on Saturday nights. You can’t beat the 55% cotton/45% poly blend. $25 to score mad chicks »


Ball

#2 • Bobcats Billiard Ball Set

Only the cue ball is pictured but I’m assuming the others have player photos printed on them considering they are priced at $170 »


Shoes

#1 • Charlotte Bobcats Adidas NBA Series 25

Honestly, these shoes nab the #1 spot because the Nike Air Jordan VIII Gerald Wallace is out of stock. Nevertheless, $58 is a steal »